Second Look
Three Versions of a Sentence with the Same Fact at Different Ends
A sentence can contain the same information while directing attention differently. Moving a detail toward the beginning or end lets you hear that change…
A place to follow a sentence
Second Look
Return to a piece with fresh questions about purpose, clarity and the experience of reading it.
Second Look
Choose Which Adjective Is Doing the Work
A row of adjectives can make an object feel less distinct because the reader has to assemble several competing impressions. A short subtraction exercise…
Second Look
A Misplaced Description Can Attach Itself to the Wrong Person
A sentence can contain all the right details and still briefly attach one to the wrong person. Revision begins by checking which noun a descriptive phrase…
Second Look
A Colon Can Make the Second Half of a Sentence Deliver on the First
A colon can create a small promise: the words before it prepare the reader for what follows. Testing that relationship is more useful than adding the mark…
Second Look
A Draft Can Have Too Many Sentences That Begin the Same Way
Mark repeated sentence openings in a draft and vary the structure where it obscures emphasis, while preserving repetition that serves a clear purpose.
Second Look
Passive Voice Can Change What a Sentence Puts First
Compare active and passive versions of a sentence to choose its focus deliberately, while checking whether an unnamed actor matters to the reader.
Second Look
Two Negatives Can Make an Instruction Harder to Follow
Revise instructions with stacked negatives by naming the required action, while preserving exceptions and the meaning of the original rule.
Second Look
Use a Semicolon to Connect Two Complete Thoughts
A semicolon can link closely related independent clauses. Test an original sentence, compare a full stop and keep the punctuation that supports the relationship.